One of the women I work with (who is adamantly CF as well) got a puppy back in November. Tragedy struck last night and Nelson was killed by a car. She is completely devastated.
Many of the people at work are contributing to a donation to Best Friends in honor of Nelson. I can't afford to contribute right now, but I would like to do something nice for her, and I can't think of what to do. We're friendly at work, but don't really socialize outside of work, so I can't really help her at home, or take her anything to her house, etc.
Do any of you have any ideas of how I can show my sympathy and support? I don't expect that she'll be back at work before Monday. Nelson was such a sweet dog (she brought him in a couple of times), and this was such an awful and unexpected thing. I'm just heartbroken for her.
Vanessa
How terrible, truly, just terrible. Are you able to just throw in $5 at least for the Best Friends group donation? That would be nice. Even $3 would be nice. And/or a sympathy card signed by everyone, announcing the donation. It's a very nice gesture, even though it's not a lot of money.
When my friend who lives down the street lost his Pug to a bee sting last year, I had no idea what to do. I sent him an email telling him how devastated I was, too, because I loved her and my Pug loved her so much. Then he called me and asked me to take my Pug over to his house so he could cuddle with her and I did that. And I just listened. Just telling him how upset I was and listening to him talk was a big help I'm sure.
How sad! I'm so sorry.
They have pet sympathy cards now that you can give. I had to buy a sympathy card for a friend who lost a pet a couple of months ago - I didn't really like the pet sympathy ones - I ended up just buying a straight sympathy card.
I would give her a personal card and a hug and just tell her how sorry you are and that you're there for her.
I second the card. Maybe a few flowers or even just a small batch of cookies? If not I think a card would be great and appreciated.
A card is great, along with a heartfelt message.
I also think that a card is a very thoughtful gesture.
(I remember when my Aunt's neighbor's cat died. My Aunt (who lives alone) had become really, really attached to this cat over the 10 years that it use to come around her house and my Aunt was absolutely crushed when the cat stopped coming around and then she was devastated when she heard that the cat passed away.
So, I sent my Aunt a card telling her that I was sorry for the loss of her little visitor. She appreciated so much! She thought the card was the niceest gesture and it made her feel a lot better to know that she wasn't alone with her feelings of losing a pet.)
If you have a 99 cent store by you, they have some really nice cards, actually. Actually, a lot of stores carry nice cards fro 99 cents (Rite-Aid, CVS, etc...)
Thank you for the ideas everyone. Turns out, they're circulating a group card in addition to the separate donation. I signed the card, but I think I'll also get a separate card for her myself. (I may even have one at home that would be appropriate, now that I think about it.)
It just makes my heart hurt to think about poor Nelson.
Vanessa
A card and possibly a few poems from the Rainbow Bridge site - there are some really lovely things on there. Just a recognition of her loss is something she would appreciate, I'm sure.
Agree with all of the above. A card with a nice message or poem inside.
Tell her about the Rainbow Bridge site so she can go there and express her sorrow among folks going through it at the same time. There are other pet memorial sites she can visit. Googling them up for her would be a nice gesture.
I can tell you what NOT to do. Don't EVER say "You should get a new one. The shelters are full of animals who need homes." A couple of a-holes said that to me the day after my cat died. I could have killed them! Ironically enough, one was from my NK! chapter. You'd think she'd know better!
So sorry to be late to this post.. Oh my heart just aches at the loss of poor Nelson.
AND ITA with everyone here on the card idea.
OR if you want to do something extra special, make her some cookies or cake or pie or something. I am sure she has been too sick with grief to focus on keeping her energy levels up.
But, If its too late, I am sorry
poor Nelson.
I'd also suggest mentioning it in future. I mean, don't bring it up all the time, but for the next couple months maybe say to her "Hey, how are you doing?" Validating the continuing feelings of loss that she will likely have is probably more appreciated than most things in the long term. She might also want to reminisce about the good memories she had about Nelson, so if she seems like the type who could cope with it maybe mention things like "Oh, I have such good memories of him when you brought him in that one time and... "
I second everyone who suggested a card, or even just a hug. It's so wonderful to know somebody cares... money need not ever enter into it.