03-11-2009, 04:05 PM
"Preaching to a Bear"
A priest, a Baptist preacher and a rabbi all served as chaplains to
the students at the University of Northern British Columbia , Fort St.James
campus. The three would get together two or three times a week for coffee
and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people
isn't really all that hard, but a real challenge would be to preach to a
bear.. One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment. They
would all go out into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it.
Seven days later they met to discuss their experiences.
Father Flannigan, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has
various bandages on his body and limbs, goes first.
"Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find a bear and when I
found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism.
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me
around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary
Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next
week to give him first communion and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and
both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory
he proclaimed, "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out
and I FOUND ME a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY
WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and
we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another
until we came to a crick. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy
soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a
lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was
lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and
monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.
The Rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, I suppose
circumcision may not have been the best way to start.
A priest, a Baptist preacher and a rabbi all served as chaplains to
the students at the University of Northern British Columbia , Fort St.James
campus. The three would get together two or three times a week for coffee
and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people
isn't really all that hard, but a real challenge would be to preach to a
bear.. One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment. They
would all go out into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it.
Seven days later they met to discuss their experiences.
Father Flannigan, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has
various bandages on his body and limbs, goes first.
"Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find a bear and when I
found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism.
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me
around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary
Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next
week to give him first communion and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and
both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory
he proclaimed, "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out
and I FOUND ME a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY
WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and
we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another
until we came to a crick. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy
soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a
lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was
lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and
monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.
The Rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, I suppose
circumcision may not have been the best way to start.